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Friday, September 14

I Need Material

Every morning when I walk in the park I pass high school students (who have been recruited by the Marines) practicing "maneuvers." It's some program designed to get the kids psyched for the physical activity necessary to pass boot camp, I imagine. The kids are maybe a year (or less) too young to join, but they are getting primed for active duty when they become of age. To me, they look like babies. They have already been brainwashed.

Now I come in. I heckle them (and I'm sober too). "Don't join!" "Go back to your studies!" "Go to college!"
and to the Marines who are barking orders at them: "How was Iraq?" "Tell them about Iraq!" "Your commander in chief is a lunatic!"

Yesterday a young man/boy was terribly winded and on the sidelines huffing and puffing. I walked over to ask him in my most motherly concerned voice, "Honey are you okay?" He replied, "Yes sir! I mean yes, ma'am." Then I told him not to join the military at this time.

I need some short and effective statements for these kids. Got any?

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