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Friday, July 20

Tucker makes me throw up in my mouth

When I see Tucker Swanson McNear Carlson on television, I involuntarily throw up a little in my mouth. I can't help it. Before I can change the channel, I feel the burn.

Carlson's askeered of wimmin. He thinks that they are out to git him and kick him in the nuts. He likes to say, ad nauseum, "When Hillary comes on television, I involuntarily cross my legs." Hey, he gave me an idea!

Boys like Carlson believe any woman who thinks for herself is a nut crusher. He pretends that his masculinity is at stake so he cowers like a little girl in the presence of a woman who isn't shy. So be it. Maybe he hates women because his mom named him Tucker and growing up with a name that rhymes with fucker gave him untold grief in his childhood which he refuses to get over. But he is laughing all the way to the bank by giving other "he-men" a forum for their fears. He's allowed to go on television and malign women who have something important to say for no other reason than that they are women and he fears for his balls. This says a lot. Perhaps it is he who is a metaphorical nut-crusher. Hey, if the jockstrap fits...

Speaking of Hillary, I have long suspected that the men on the so called "right" hate her guts because she didn't dump Bill for cheating on her. He sure did make a fool of her, but for whatever personal reasons, she didn't divorce him. It's none of my business. Personally, I think that not leaving is the best vengeance if you have the stomach for it. After all, Republican politicians expect to be divorced, forgiven by god and then marry the chippy who they banged on the side until the next chippy comes along. It's called serial monogamy. Someone ought to write a book about the GOP wives scorned. (This is not approved by Jesus however. According to the New Testament, your spouse would have to be dead before you marry again. Second marriages are just as adulterous as cheating if your original spouse is still alive if you are a "christian." No matter what the circumstances are. And don't knit pick with me on this. I know my shit.)

All this brings me to Mrs. Vitter. Wendy Vitter. Buzzflash gave her the title of GOP Hypocrite of the Week. Quite frankly I am tired of all this woman bashing when it comes to how a woman deals with the infidelity of her husband. It should be the cheating husband who is under fire, if you have to put someone under the gun, and not the wife.

Women just don't really know in advance how they will deal with infidelity because circumstances differ in every case. Sure Mrs Vitter mentioned she'd castrate her husband if he ever cheated on her during the Clinton impeachment while her very own husband was supposedly seeing prostitutes on the side... and maybe that can be seen as hypocritical because she is standing by her man while he is under fire for similar indiscretions almost 10 years later... but who knows, maybe she spoke in the heat of the moment. Maybe after all the crappola in the news lately about married but closeted homosexuals in the Republican party, she reconsidered her former stance because, hey, at least he's not gay! Or maybe she has a little intern on the side now. Or maybe she really loves him in spite of his failings. Imagine that?

I would not bash Wendy Vitter for standing by her man or expect her to live up to her word and cut his penis off or divorce him just so she can prove that she's not a GOP hypocrite. Her husband is the GOP hypocrite in this case and that's all there is to it. Bash him if you have to bash someone.

... which brings me back to Hillary Clinton. Hillary was damned if she did and damned if she didn't. She was a woman who had some ideas and that is simply not acceptable in this white man's corporate world. So the hell what if she had political ambitions? This is a representational government and there are simply too many men representing us. She's is expected to raise money in order to run for office because that's how it works in this country. I dare anyone to go ahead and try it while still sticking to their principles 100%. Sometimes you have to play the game in order to get to the strategic position that could change things. Bush did. He pretended that he gave a shit. Do you think Hillary would stand a chance by acting like a Stepford wife? She is expected to be twice as "fabulous" as a man in order to garner any respect and it is unfair, it's sucky and it stinks. Why do we expect so much more from a woman than from a man? Don't answer that- I know the answer.

So Tucker, go ahead and cross your legs. You big baby.

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