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Friday, December 22

Another Friday, Another Excommunication

If you grew up Catholic, January 1st was a holy day of obligation (meaning if you didn't go to Mass, then it's a mortal sin and you will go to hell) because it was the Feast of the Circumcision. Looking back, it was kind of creepy, but then again, there were a lot of weird and paranormal holy days that were observed. If we giggled while the nuns explained a particular practice or observance, we were quickly admonished and warned of that special place in hell for Catholic boys and girls who asked questions. Our parents couldn't explain any of the weirdness to us, "Be quiet and put on your church clothes or we'll be late for mass." When I finally learned what a circumcision was, I paid attention at Mass that time, but the priest didn't talk about Jesus' foreskin at all. You weren't allowed to mention Jesus and penis in the same sentence when I was growing up.

I was over at Jesus' General and read his letter concerning the Holy Prepuce (Holy Foreskin) being stolen and it not being mentioned in the mass media for lo these past 23 years. It got me giggling like a Catholic school girl again. It seems that in 1983, the holy foreskin wasn't going to be available for devotion and procession that year because someone stole it out of the priests' closet. Some say that it was stolen by the Vatican because no one was supposed to use the words penis and Jesus in the same sentence. oops

As a matter of fact, in 1900, the Vatican supposedly decreed that if anyone were to write or speak of the holy foreskin, they would be excommunicated. So there you go. I guess I'm excommunicated again.

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