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Tuesday, March 29

My Momma Done Told Me

... all sorts of stuff and it's all coming back to me now. My daddy said a lot of things too that are coming back to me as well. Let's start with daddy.

Daddy liked to quote Shakespeare: "The Lady doth protest too much". He would say that when he knew that I was bending the truth by way of pleading my case a bit too much. "No daddy, I never ever kissed that boy. Ew. Yuk. Of course not. Oh my, yuk. I am not up to kissing yet, daddy." etc etc... By golly, he was right. A sure sign that someone has something to hide is when they keep pounding their agenda in your face.

Momma always told me that "A sure sign that your man is cheating on you is when he accuses you of cheating". By golly, she was right too. So often people with skeletons in their closets project their bones upon unsuspecting others. Case in point, that famous "liberal agenda" we are always hearing about from the conservatives... as if there is a liberal agenda. Liberal and agenda are oxymorons. And let's not forget the anti-homosexual agenda purveyed by the largest cabal of closeted and jealous homosexuals ever to run a country.

Now that I am a parent, I passed on some of my parents wisdom to my little one plus I added somethings. "Overcompensation is a sure sign of under compensation", "Boys who bully you are bullied at home", "Boys who have the biggest toys have the smallest peni". My Gawd, I sound like Stewart's mother on Mad TV... but my son knows me and my sick sense of humor. He also sees the grains of truth in my statements. In other words, don't trust the bullies and the braggarts. They feel bad about themselves.

My friend Billydoom likes to tell me sayings from the old country. Here's one I like, "If someone is bragging about his riches, give him some money". Yes, the braggers are usually broke. Secure people don't bother to talk about it, now do they?

Now let's think of all the things in the news and all the things that are not making the mainstream media which apply here.

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