by pissed off patricia
I'm Feeling a Little Frisky this Morning.
Here's what Senator Kerry should say the next time someone asks him what he would do about the war in Iraq if he were president. He should say, "About fifty percent of the American people still believe that there was WMD in Iraq and that Saddam had something to do with 9-11. When I'm the president I will tell that same fifty percent of gullible assholes that we won the war and then I'll bring our soldiers home. Shit, this bunch of idiots will believe anything they're told so this'll be a piece of cake, especially if I tell them that god said we won too. Lemons and lemonade ya know."
If bush is re-selected to administer four more years of hell, (shiver, quaking in boot area) can we have one concession? Can bush and Kerry trade wives so that Teresa can be our first lady? Think about it. Teresa would kick the hell out of bush, get in his face and read him the riot act about what he has done to our environment, and then she would slap him up against the wall just for all the lies he has told us. She would take the term "bitch slapping" to a grand new level. She would make bush feel that eating a pretzel, riding a scooter and riding a bike were the very least of his dangers as far as physical injuries are concerned. She would make him snivel in the darkness. Yeah, Teresa wouldn't give the cold shoulder to mothers whose children have been killed in bush's war. She would invite them to come to the white house, she would hug them and hold them, and then she would invite them to also kick the hell out of bush. Are you loving the mental picture you're getting right about now? I am! I don't think Teresa would grin and pretend the war is just part of being a patriot, a necessity of evil. I think Teresa would tell us that her new husband was a lunatic and she would have him committed if not imprisoned. Oh yeah, I think we need to do this thing. They owe us that much, don't they?
Wait, I guess that wouldn't be fair to Senator Kerry. He probably doesn't need a door mat wife hanging around for four years. That would be torture for him because he's used to an independent thinking, intelligent wife and he sure as hell wouldn't get that if he got stuck with Laura the robot.
Now I'm Not Feeling So Frisky
Okay, I don't understand. On Chris Matthews show this morning the reporters said that more women will vote for bush because they believe he will keep their kids safer. Say what? How is sending your sons and daughters to war keeping them safer? How is creating more enemies in the middle east keeping kids safer? How is poisoning the air and water keeping kids safer? Please don't tell me that a majority of American women are that dense. Please don't tell me that.
Bush lies and his poll numbers grow. Kerry tells the truth and his poll numbers fall. There's your mystery. Bush invades a country based on lies, thousands die and the war is going to hell, but his poll numbers go up. Kerry will be stuck with this war if he wins and everyone is kicking his ass because he doesn't have an exact plan to end this war. WTF? Of course he can't have an exact plan now because he has no idea what kind of shape the war will be in as of the first of the year. To ask him for his exact plan is like asking someone what they would do if they were in a boat that was sinking. You have no clue what your plan would be until you experience the circumstances and know the immediate situation. Jeeezzz.
Things are in a strange state right now and every time you think they can't get any stranger, they do.