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Tuesday, May 20

what the f*ck is growing on dat face?


I've asked about Senator McCain's facial flaws time and time again and was usually met with silence or some speech on why I am a shallow bitch with too much time on my hands. But I never gave a shit about his face until he became a viable candidate for president. It looks like a tumor is growing on his face and it appears to be getting larger. Is this something that will kill him while he's in office? And if so, who he picks for his veep is something very important for Americans to consider, is it not?

Well thank gawd for America's favorite doctor, Sanjay Gupta who had a piece on last evening, a veritable eeewwww-fest of stitches and redness and swelling- the face of the senator who wants to be president at any cost. Lucky you, Dr Gupta has a blog post about the face that launched a thousand "eeeeewwwwws."

You have probably also heard McCain has malignant melanoma. Our research shows that if elected, he would not be the first president to have cancer. Grover Cleveland had cancer in his jaw. Reagan had both colon cancer and skin cancer, a less serious basal cell carcinoma, on his nose. From what we have gathered, McCain has Stage IIA melanoma, which carries an average 10-year survival rate of 66 percent. Dermatologists say McCain’s odds are better because the odds improve the longer you go without a recurrence.

If you see the pictures of his face, you will no doubt see a scar running down the left side and persistent puffiness of his left cheek. This is from the aggressive operation he had to remove the cancer as well as the lymph nodes in the area, as well as part of his parotid gland. When we show those pictures to independent doctors, some have told us an operation of that magnitude would’ve been done only for a much more serious and aggressive cancer than IIA melanoma. Other doctors disagree, saying McCain’s aggressive operation may have been done out of an abundance of caution, where doctors removed more lymph nodes and other tissue than is normally done, because he is, well, John McCain.
Well ok then. He is very lucky to have had such great medical benefits and to be alive today. Most of us regular people would have been dead... even those of us with medical benefits like mine that suck. Senator McCain's healthcare plan sucks so this post menopausal lady with fears of the future won't be considering a vote for him, not to mention his "bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb Iran" song which wasn't funny at all.

But Dr Gupta asks the all important questions, "How important is the health of McCain or any of the candidates for that matter? Should the medical records be more forthcoming?"

Absofuckinglutely.

Not that anyone cares what I or you, dear readers, think, it makes for great discussions on the "what if this president dies and his/her veep takes over." Since Mike Huckleberry is jonesing for the veep slot, I find it rather hilarious to think that he could be the president and what a truly interesting battle would go on between the House and the Executive Branch considering that Huck is a preacher man in a secular country.

As I recall 8 years ago, CNN devoted an awful lot of time to Cheney's heart or lack thereof and he was only going to be the VP. I say, "bring it on" about McCain's face. It would be interesting to note that anecdotes about his grumpiness pervade the Senate and it's not clear whether he was always grumpy or if this is a new thing which could indicate that his health is on the decline.

And while we're at it, what is the health status of Hillary and Barry?

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