How ya doon? As you know, I live in Noo Yawk. I live in a pawt called Lawn Guyland which iz very close to da city so we go to da city to see junk a lot. Especially at Chrissmisstime cause it's nice ta look at.
So here's some links to cool Noo Yawk shit for ya ta check out. Fugeddabowdit. Ya don't have ta tank me. kay? kay. I included some translations for yooz idiots out dere.
Da windiz of da fancy stawz.
Ya gotta tell da kids dat dere's no way ya gonna buy dem shit in doze staws though. There's perfectly good stuff for sale along the sidewalk, ya know?
Translation for idiots: Lovely windows at some of New Yorks finer retail establishments.
Fancy schmancy Chrissmiss trees around da city
Fuck you! Waddaya lookin' at, you piece of shit?
Translation for idiots: Elegantly decorated evergreens in and around the city.
Dey even lit up da fuckin' Bronx Zoo fa crissakes
Translation for idiots: The World Class Bronx Zoo has a spectacular light show.
Howz abouda list of bars wit festive decor?
Godda get shitfaced in a classy joint. Am I right or whut?
Translation for idiots: Meet your friends at a quaint tavern and sip hot toddies by the fire.
Yeah and here's a list of what nobody I know duz for New Yeah's.
Translation for idiots: Make your reservations early for a world class New Years Eve!
Jewevah see da Radio City Chrissmiss Show?
Itza Mussee. Doze Rockettes are gawjiss. It's a beauty-full show indeed.
Translation for idiots: Christmas wouldn't be Christmas without a visit to the famed Radio City Music Hall and an afternoon or evening spent with world famous Rockettes. Bring the whole family and expect to leave filled with holiday spirit!
Have a Very Seasoned Greeting and an unoffensive winter solstice time of year, one and all!
The sun is returning. Let us rejoice!
Ho Ho Ho!